Choosing to become a surrogate was a decision that profoundly impacted my life for the better.

Back in high school, conversations with my LGBTQ+ friends about surrogacy as a means for same-sex couples to become parents sparked my interest, says Niki Renslow. Years later, after becoming a mother myself, I felt compelled to embark on my own surrogacy journey. While I felt both excited and nervous about this decision, I was certain it was the right path for me.

For many individuals and couples, surrogacy offers a reliable and sometimes sole option for starting or growing a family. Beyond the challenges faced by same-sex couples, approximately one in six couples worldwide encounter infertility issues that may necessitate the assistance of a surrogate, egg donor, or sperm donor. In Virginia alone, over 250,000 women of childbearing age dealt with infertility as of 2020.

As someone who has experienced the rewards and challenges of surrogacy firsthand, I want to share my story with Virginia women grappling with infertility and considering surrogacy as a potential solution. Surrogacy is a transformative and deeply fulfilling experience, but it requires careful consideration and thoughtful decision-making.

In 2010, I took the step to become a surrogate through an agency that matched me with prospective parents. Meeting the intended parents, a same-sex couple residing overseas, was a moment of connection and alignment. With the agency’s support, I learned about their culture, aspirations, and vision for parenthood, which resonated deeply with mine.

Despite my easy pregnancies with my own children, I faced uncertainties about undergoing the IVF process necessary for carrying the intended parents’ embryos. My journey involved unexpected challenges, including two miscarriages and a failed embryo transfer, leading to a pause in the surrogacy process. However, with perseverance and the support of the intended parents, I ultimately experienced success with my fourth and final embryo transfer.

Throughout my pregnancy, I encountered misconceptions about surrogacy and had to clarify that I was not genetically connected to the twins I carried. Witnessing the joy of the intended parents upon meeting their children for the first time was a deeply rewarding moment.

Reflecting on my surrogacy journey, I recognized the need for a supportive community for surrogates facing similar experiences. This realization led me to join Surrogacy.com, a surrogate-centered community dedicated to educating, guiding, and supporting future surrogates. In my role, I provide guidance and support to surrogates in Virginia and beyond, helping to dispel misconceptions and normalize surrogacy as a path to parenthood.

Maintaining a close relationship with the family I helped create brings me immense joy, and I cherish the opportunity to witness the twins’ growth over the years. My journey as a surrogate has empowered me to share my story and inspire other mothers in the Virginia community to consider surrogacy as a way to make a meaningful difference in someone else’s life.